AVOIDING VENGEANCE
by
S. H.
Getting even feels good!
That’s why people do it—vengeance temporarily gives them a sense of
satisfaction, though it quickly dissipates into regret. Have you ever read one
of those imprecatory psalms? You know, the ones where
David called down God’s wrath on someone? “Break their teeth in their mouth, O
God!” (Psalm 58:6). While it’s not my life verse, I confess I’ve imprecated
people on the freeway or over parking spaces from time to time.
But I’ve learned
something: As I truly pray for people, my heart begins to change. As I start
asking God to bless them, my heart begins to soften and becomes more Christlike.
Exhibiting a loving
humility is easier said than done because people are neither always
tenderhearted nor always sympathetic. Often we are met with blatant hostility.
And Peter calls us to a gentle response: “Not returning evil for evil or
reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were
called to this, that you may inherit a blessing” (1 Peter 3:9). We’re not sure
if he was referring to unbelievers persecuting believers or if he was speaking
about fellow believers with whom we have a disagreement.
Either way, we should
respond the same way: gently.
Don’t fight back. We
bless “that [we] might inherit a blessing.” The New Living Translation makes it
even stronger: “Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God has
called you to do, and he will bless you for it.” When Peter penned this, he may
have been thinking back to the time he tried to fight evil with evil in the
Garden of Gethsemane. As the enemies came to arrest Jesus, Peter snatched a
sword and went right for Malchus’s ear! After Jesus
restored the man’s ear, He instructed Peter to put away his weapon, “for all
who take the sword will perish by the sword” (Matthew 26:52). Peter knew from
firsthand experience both the temptation to take vengeance and the importance
of leaving it up to God.
One of the greatest
virtues that separates Christianity from other belief
systems is that we are taught not to avenge ourselves nor ignore our
dissenters. We are commanded to love our enemies. This kind of response was
virtually unheard of in antiquity. Human nature—then and now—is best summed up
in the Old Testament law known as the lex talionis, which prescribed a restricted vengeance of an
eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth (see Exodus 21). Vengeance limited to
fair restitution is one thing, but to bless instead?
Peter was saying that
when you bless instead of curse—when, instead of doing what feels right,
you do what is right—you will be blessed. How you handle frustration,
annoyance and persecution today will add blessings to you in Heaven. Jesus
said, “Blessed are you when they revile and persecute you, and say all kinds of
evil against you falsely for My sake. Rejoice and be
exceedingly glad, for great is your reward in heaven” (Matthew 5:11-12). As
Solomon noted, “A soft answer turns away wrath” (Proverbs 15:1). Part of the
blessing is that it defuses your anger, allowing your wrath to be neutralized
by time and calmer emotions. The other part is that it attracts others to
Jesus’ message of love and forgiveness.
A pastor from Argentina
named Juan Carlos Ortiz wrote about a leadership conference he attended. He
said, “I saw a man who was in my former denomination, so I went over to him to
hug him.” But the man saw him coming and growled, “Don’t hug me.” Ortiz
replied, “Well, I love you.” The man almost shouted in response, “You cannot
love me because I am your enemy!” Ortiz responded, “Praise the Lord! I didn’t
know you were my enemy, but here’s an opportunity for me to love my enemies.”
He walked up to him, hugged him close, and prayed aloud, “Thank you, Jesus, for
my precious enemy.” Within one year, Ortiz was preaching at the man’s church.
His gentle response led to a giant blessing.
And there’s a practical
reason to seek that blessing. Quoting Psalm 34, Peter said, “For ‘He who would
love life and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips
from speaking deceit. Let him turn away from evil and do good;
let him seek peace and pursue it’” (1 Peter 3:10-11).
Do you love life? Do you
want to be happy—to experience and enjoy the blessing of God in your life? Then
love people—the good and the bad. Respond to people’s snorts and brusque
comments with something that will surprise them. Show them love. If you love
people, you’ll love life.
Why is this so important?
Because many don’t love life; they tolerate it, or even hate it.
Even Solomon—who had so
much—came to a point where he said, “Therefore, I hated life … for all is
vanity and vexation of spirit” (Ecclesiastes 2:17, KJV). I even know some
Christians who, when I ask how they’re doing, just answer, “Oh, I’m OK. Making it through.” It’s
understandable to feel that way during a rough week or two, but month after
month, year after year, for a whole lifetime? It reminds me of the pessimistic
donkey from Winnie the Pooh. I wonder, did the
spirit of Eeyore take over?
God’s perfect love casts
out all fear (1 John 4:18), which should motivate us to leave Him in control.
Everyone you encounter is allowed into your life by God for His own purposes.
When you realize that, you’ll want to make sure that you bless whoever it may
be, not curse them. Peter offered further motivation: “For the eyes of the Lord
are on the righteous” (1 Peter 3:12).
Not only is God looking
after you, He’s listening to you. Peter continued: “And His ears are open to
their prayers” (1 Peter 3:12). I don’t have to worry about those who are trying
to do me evil. God will deal with them in His own way, so I don’t have to exact
revenge.
As you go through this
unpredictable life, hold on to the sweetness of God’s character, for that will
provide both stability and sensitivity. Remember, there was a time when you
were unlovely, when you rejected Him, when you failed to love others the way He
does, and yet Jesus loved and died for you (see Romans 5:8).
So, here we are, not the
company of the faultless but of the forgiven. The proof is in our open doors
and open hearts. We welcome the unlovely, the hurting, the coarse—we
welcome each other. We let go of ourselves and our self-centeredness and hold
on to Jesus. While we will feel upset—in the car or the grocery line or in
conversation—we can choose to show His compassion, His patience, His humility
and tenderheartedness. In this way, we avoid the vanity of vengeance—by the
sweetness, the kindness, the respect and wonder of His love.